


Dirty Hands

by Freckles_and_glasses



Category: Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: But whatever, Jim has a surprise, M/M, and sebs gunna love it, jims doing it, sebs probably not gunna like it, spoiler: johnlock baby, spoiler: johnlock!dads, spoiler: mormor baby, spoiler: mormor!dads
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 04:28:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2608490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freckles_and_glasses/pseuds/Freckles_and_glasses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim has a surprise for Seb but won't tell him what. Seb happens to find Jim's phone and reads his messages with a certain Holmes, rising his suspicion. It involves a gun, blood, diapers, knives and dirty hands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

    Sebastian spots Jim's phone on the couch while Jim's in the shower, curiosity consumed Sebastian and he grabs his lover's phones and unlocks it. It opens with the messages. 

 

:I'm going to go shower first, there'll be blood so might as well clean up first. -JM

:I was thinking the same but John's in the shower, I'll just sterilize. -SH

 

 

     Sebastian furrowed his brows and looked away from the phone before scrolling up the messages from an hour ago.

 

 

:Where were you planning on getting it from? -JM

:It's not an it James, remember? -SH

:Ah yes, human, I just keep forgetting. -JM

:How do you think Sebastian will react? -SH 

:Somewhere between "omfg kitten I can't even ily" and "oh really? I thought you didn't get your hands dirty." Seb is occasionally unpredictable. -JM 

:I'm sorry I can't say the same, John will just be disappointed and sigh and make a face but secretly love me for it. -SH

:Hm, have you come up with a name yet? Because they need those. -JM 

:Well, actually, I've got one in mind but I was also thinking of Macroitt, Iren, Marriet(Marri for short), Leslie, Bartholomew..but I think I'll go with Hamish. John's middle name. -SH

:I'd be lying if I didn't think that was adorable. Macroitt and Marriet obviously the combination of your two's siblings: Mycroft and Harriet. Leslie, a name that could go both ways. Iren, a male version of your old dear friend Irene and Bartholomew for the beloved hospital. Absolutely adorable. -JM

:I was considering Alexande MorMor. But apparently I can't change our last names to MorMor. So I will allow his or her last name to be Moran but professionally it will be Moriarty so people know what bloody hell they're dealing with. But Alexande because it goes both ways and is simply beauteous and professional. -JM

:I agree, but... what about Jastian, or Winchester(nickname could be Winnie or Win?) -SH

:Like the rifle. Brilliant. That would certainly please Sebastian. Taken under consideration. -JM

:What time will you be picking up?-SH

:After I get ready, and you know, get the supplies. -JM

:Tell me when you're leaving I'll leave then too. -SH

:I'm going to go shower first, there'll be blood so might as well clean up first. -JM

     Sebastian looked up as the shower turned off, turning off the phone. 

     "Sebby! I forgot my towel!" Jim shouted as he exited the bathroom, wet, naked and a sly smirk, "oops." 

     Sebastian raised his eye brow, not forgetting about the phone but not taking his eyes off his boyfriend. 


	2. Smith & Wesson

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> •Jim leaves to get the surprise  
> •Sebastian gets a call from John  
> •Seb takes a nap  
> •Seb wakes up to Jim's voice  
> •Jim has come home with blood

Jim got out of bed and walked to the bathroom to grab a towel. The sex had gotten messier than Jim liked, Sebastian had had to be punished for it before he left the bed. 

Jim wiped up and tossed the towel to Sebastian before hurrying to get dressed. Seb sat up and watched his boyfriend curiously, he hadn't discussed where he was going or for what, and what his text messages were suppose to mean but Seb had a feeling he shouldn't ask. 

Once Jim was all dressed, from combed hair to Westwood to black dress shoes. He stood at the foot of the bed where Sebastian still lie naked. 

"Okay, go ahead and ask me." Jim grinned. 

"Ask you wh-" 

"No. Ask me why I'm dressed up and where I'm going." 

"Why are you dress-" 

"Sooo glad you asked!" Jim exclaimed, "I'm going out, it's a formal kinda thing, I will bring back a gift though." 

Sebastian sighed, "Well, then where are you going?" 

"I'm not going to tell you." Jim giggled.

"Am I coming with you?" Sebastian asked. Jim shook his head. 

"No no, no need for that. I'll be fine." Jim answered tucking a few daggers into his jacket, and a nice silver Smith & Wesson tucked in the back top of his pants. 

"Fine, eh?" Sebastian repeated to himself. 

"Yes, Sebby, fine, love you." Jim said walking over to give him a kiss before walking out the door. Sebastian lied there dumbfounded. 

Ten minutes later Sebastian's phone vibrated, he furrowed his eye brows at it. He never had his phone on anything but silent. ( incase he was stalking in quiet, he doesn't need Moriarty's Bee Gees Staying Alive ring tone playing, ratting out his hiding place ) he grabbed his phone and looked to see a message from 'Boss'. 

:Hi Sebby, do you know who I am? Yes you do, darling, I Am The Consulting Criminal. Do you know what that means Sebastian? I know everything, for instance that you went through my messages in the shower, just couldn't resist. You've almost spoiled the bloody surprise. Do you want to spoil the bloody surprise? Of course not, I'll be home around 5. -JM

Sebastian sighed. Dropping his phone beside him on the bed, only to have it ring.   
He grabbed it and answered it, pressing it to his ear, "Moran." 

"Hello... Sebastian. It's John. Has Jim just left?" 

Sebastian chuckled, shaking his head, "Yes, Am guessin' Holmes' gone and their out planning something? Some sort of only Consulting Criminals and Consulting Detectives thing?" 

John chuckled nervously, "I read his messages before he left and-" 

"They're going together to get something, and it's goin' to be bloody. I read his cell too." 

"Do you have any idea where?" John questioned. 

"Best thing to do is wait it out Watson, Jim made it very clear I am not to "ruin the surprise"."

John sighed and nodded through the phone, "You can call us by our first names, you know that right? John and Sherlock." 

"Hm." 

"Well that was all, thank you Sebastian, we'll talk soon?" John asked, Moran nodded and said goodbye before dropping his phone again and closing his eyes and falling asleep. 

 

"Sebby~" Sebastian's eye lid twitched. 

"Sebbbyy~ baby, wake up." Sebastian's breathing started deepening and his hand twitched. 

"Sebastian, love, wake up now, darling." (Sebastian's brain door opened and little Sebastian brain men turned on the lights and sat down to open his eyes, and control his brain)

Sebastian's eyes opened, his room, his bed, his flat, Jim's voice. 

"Morning Tiger," Jim said as Sebastian rolled over to see him, "meet your cub." 

Jim stood by the bed close to Sebastian, Sebastian noticed unnoticeable blood stains on his pants, jacket, shirt, hands then in his hands was a bundle of blood— a baby. 

The baby was bloody and awake, Jim had the baby wrapped in a white blanket and was smiling down at the infant. 

"Meet Winchester Moriarty." 


End file.
